chesedonia | an epic tale of what you've put me through

[it took keith an eternity for him to actually realize his feelings were in fact feelings and not just some weird.... misinterpreted form of jealousy or disgust. well okay-- it probably also is some weird form of jealousy too, if we're being completely honest here? though, if we are being honest here, keith was definitely infatuated with lance. (and to note: he absolutely refused to use the words "in love" or "in like" because that just made it feel all the more high schoolish) at first he just brushed it to the side as some weird formation of respect?

despite popular belief he actually enjoyed lance's company. when he wasn't yapping on about girls or how cute allura looked-- or that one alien chick he bumped into the other day-- yeah. that got incredibly old and increasingly infuriating. and boy did he take it out on lance too. it's not like he meant to throw his punches harder or aim for his shins at practice. he just. didn't want to hear it. and the only way to get him to stop talking about it was to, well....

look okay, keith wasn't proud of it! though, also in that same sense, he didn't quite realize he was doing it either. shiro actually had to pull keith aside one day to figure out what was up with keith's misdirected rage. once he realized what was up he gave keith a few words of seldom advice and left him alone to interpret them. which is where we are now.

keith rung his hands nervously as he stared down at one of the various scuffs on his boots. for as much as he refused to use "in love" with lance, because that term was just-- so high school. he definitely acted like a high school girl with a crush. it was embarrassing! it was mortifying!! and-- well, it was down right terrifying. this is lance we're talking about. there is no way he would reciprocate any of the same feelings. he was just... well. too straight. the moment keith realized what his feelings were was also the moment he realized he didn't have a chance in hell. he was better off developing feelings for kaltenecker.

not that he would date a cow, but. it would be better to deal with his feelings than how he's currently fairing right now.

which, if we're being perfectly honest right now?? he's not fairing so well. he leans back and sighs. again. for the 20th time that day.]

God this is so unnecessary. Why do feelings have to be a thing...